And that's just what you do when you realize September 19th was Talk Like A Pirate Day.
It's true, do it! do it now! We missed it. All those who didn't talk like a pirate on friday will have to walk the plank with me. ARR!
A pirate speaks,"O'ly wale shite t' is Septembre the 19th?! Wall, den I bedder learn 'ow t' talk like a pirate 'fore arget jabbed oon me aft by a randy arse pirate den!"
Loosely translated into non-pirate speak, "Holy whale shit it's Sept. 19?! Well, then I better learn how to talk like a pirate before I get jabbed in my ass by a horny butt pirate then!"
Yeah, I really don't know what the fuss is all about either. So a couple of dweebos, obviously bored with nothing better to do, get the idea from watching Treasure Island over and over again. Big deal! So they've received worldwide recognition and throngs of followers. Whooptie doo!
Pirates suck. You hear that Johnny Depp? They suck cast iron ship cannons. And our stereotypical idea of pirates is dead too. When was the last time you saw a real pirate? Well, maybe if you have your own private yacht and you went sailing in the Caribbean recently you got attacked by modern day pirates (thieves) with muskets (machine guns, grenades) and they stole all your treasure (cargo, money, drugs) and your booty (your wife's and/or possibly yours too). But that's rare. Gone are thar days of yore arr! (shit I'm doing it again) This is a new era! Nowadays, pirates are on the internet!
More pirate speak, "We like stealing stuff off the internet! Movies, music, software you name it. Thank the stars for piracy! YAAR!"
Since we're talking about (bashing) pirates...I'm not sure if this is Chris Crocker impersonating a pirate or just a really sad drag queen...
"Leave Blackbeard Alone!"
Yeeesh. What a wussy pirate. Why you could sail your ship in all his tears and pee (yes, he wet his pants). He sets a real poor example for all pirates and so are all those International Talk Like A Pirate wannabes and their hot wenches too.
Everyone knows pirates were and still are ugly, smelly and gross and so were their wenches.
Anyway, Happy (be-lated) International Talk Like A Pirate (dork) Day!