10,000 B.C. Movie Reviewed by Cavemen

Ugg, me don't know how to say... me have little language skill.

This our review for movie 10,000 B.C. due in theaters March 7.

First, I want to say caveman circa 10,000 B.C. look more like me!
**sniffs grunts**

No, you thinking of 20,000 B.C. Me think they looked handsome like me in 10,000 B.C.!

No, what meant to say was, me think they look nothing like Hollywood depicts us look like.

What?
Don't listen him.
Anyway, 10,000 B.C. has lots of action with plankton, other cave people, sabre tooth tiger and WOOLY mammoth!

Rah YEAH, WOOLY mammoth action!!!
**drools**

What?

10,000 B.C. will be the movie I go see on sly, and pretend it not utter trash, me not completely above watching 10,000 B.C. Really, the lead cavewoman pretty nice piece of prehistoric ass, with spear, so it a can't miss for me. Are there hot blond cavewomen? There gotta be hot blond cavewomen. Hot blond cavewomen...Yum.
Now here some sneak peeks from movie 10,000 B.C.

What the hell was that? Me have no idea what this movie about. 10,000 B.C. looks like it was made in 10,000 B.C. This movie suck.






WOOLY mammoth action!!!
**drools**

Viva Cuba!

Viva Cuba Gooding Jr.!

Famous Cuban actor, Cuba Gooding Jr. scared witless by his own fame.

Show me the money! That's how you become great, man. Hang your balls out there! Anywho, enough with the Jerry Maguire references.

What I do have to share with readers today is a bevy of very interesting facts about the country of Cuba. Some Most I would have never imagined.

What is Gorilla Marketing?

In 2005 Gorilla Marketing was developed. Gorilla Marketing (or 'Gorilla Warfare') was invented by Che Guevara (a.k.a. "Chimp" Guevara), the world's foremost expert on all things related to Gorillas and Cuba.

Gorilla Marketing is a relatively new arsenal of advertising weaponry, and promotional products that humans go APE over! It combines an unconventional system of promotions on a very low budget. Or no budget really, gorillas come cheap.

By relying on gorilla time, gorilla energy, and gorilla imagination instead of big marketing budgets that were common in the ancient history of advertising; the end result is usually a lot of poo flinging, tire swinging, Samsonite luggage tossing and banana beatings, until the assailed individual(s) buy(s) the marketed product(s).

Sss! That's the sound a gorilla fart makes (another tactic commonly used.)




A frightening proposition since this gorilla likes teh butt secks.

Everyone Knows an "Annoying Guy"

And now a little piece aptly entitled, "The Last Road Trip"...

Awww, what a friend! Ol Glapp should have ended up in hell.
He's the kind of guy who ate paint chips, glue and lead pencils when he was a kid. Too bad that didn't kill him. He's the kind of guy that spoons sour cottage cheese into shoes at Walmart. The kind of guy that has a big hole in his head, and you wish he'd shut it. The kind of guy you want to thrash into the dashboard, stuff a sock in his mouth, strap with duct tape and put in the trunk for the remainder of the trip.

When you check out, if spent shell casings aren't littered around your feet, you didn't check out right.

The Funny Cannot Be Displayed

I have an announcement to make. Brace yourselves, you may want to sit down. I am experiencing a bout of comedy block. I can't think of anything funny to write.

How is this possible you may ask? It's simple and humiliating really. Similar to writer's block, when the inflicted is encompassed by the loathsome mental impotence that causes comedy block, the brain ceases to generate humorous thoughts.