Bin Laden...dead? Just for the record, this is not exclusive footage, nor is it a dramatic reenactment. At best, it is a cheap sloppy imitation, or whimsical imagining. Good day.
Bin Laden...dead? Just for the record, this is not exclusive footage, nor is it a dramatic reenactment. At best, it is a cheap sloppy imitation, or whimsical imagining. Good day.
"Why not just tell people I'm an alien from Mars. Tell them I eat live chickens and do a voodoo dance at midnight. They'll believe anything you say, because you're a reporter. But if I, Michael Jackson, were to say, 'I'm an alien from Mars and I eat live chickens and do a voodoo dance at midnight,' people would say, 'Oh, man, that Michael Jackson is nuts. He's cracked up. You can't believe a damn word that comes out of his mouth.'"
— Michael Jackson "The King of Pop"
Dr. Jack Kevorkian offers discounted euthanasia housecalls!
According to Dr. Kevorkian, this site alone, but especially if combined with memes and internet jokes, such as Goatse and/or Tubgirl have destroyed massive amounts of neurons in all of his patients, resulting in eventual brain death to the viewer.
BUT for a limited time only he is offering a new experimental euthanization for the discounted price of $29.95
The Farewell Tour prescription drug!
Order now! ..or feel free to continue the suffering and prolonging of: the inevitability of being in chronic pain - being a vegetable - being a famous celebrity devoid of privacy constantly harassed by people who never leave you alone - being famous but accused of criminal acts that ruin your career and the only way out is death - being a pathetic second-rate commiserable blogger who writes articles in poor taste thereby alienating themself from the blogosphere - or of just being some nobody that people don't care about.
For a one-time-only payment of $29.95 Farewell Tour is the faster - more effective injectable euthanization process*. Just one shot, and it's like taking a nap. Forever.
It worked for Michael and now it can work for you!†
Order today!
*Proven effective for up to the rest of your life in clinical studies.
† Individual results may vary.
This is the very same procedure Michael Jackson used..but only resulted in his cardiac arrest.
Don't expect the same results as Michael, he was a tough nut to crack.
IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION
The Farewell Tour prescription drug is a treatment option you and your doctor can consider along with lifestyle changes. When taking it, don’t drive or operate machinery. Plan to devote the rest of your natural waking life to sleep before trying to be active. Sleepwalking, moonwalking, and eating or driving while not fully awake, with memory loss for the event, as well as abnormal behaviors such as being more outgoing or aggressive than normal, confusion, agitation, hallucinations, and death may occur. Don’t take it with alcohol as it may increase these behaviors.
In patients with depression, worsening of depression, including risk of suicide may or definitely will occur. If you experience any of these behaviors contact your doctor immediately. Allergic reactions such as shortness of breath, swelling of your tongue or throat, blurred vision, may occur and in most cases may be fatal. If you have an allergic reaction while using Farewell Tour, contact your doctor immediately. Side effects of Farewell Tour may include next-day drowsiness, dizziness, headache, or interment (burial). There is a low occurrence of side effects associated with the short-term use of Farewell Tour. The most commonly observed side effects in controlled clinical trials were drowsiness, dizziness, diarrhea, and death. Side effects also include the disappearance of your doctor, but don't worry this is a temporary side effect and will be resolved with the police impounding his or her vehicle, their on-going investigations, and local medical examiner autopsy reports.
Farewell Tour is taken for 7 to 10 minutes –or longer as advised by your provider. Farewell Tour can be taken as long as your doctor recommends. Farewell Tour has some risk of dependency. Especially if it doesn't work the first time, but Farewell Tour is non-narcotic. What a relief huh?
Please consult your doctor for full prescribing information and medication guide.
© 2009 Kevorkian U.S. LLC. All rights reserved.
"I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers."
- Kahlil Gibran
Sun Dec. 21, 2008
Bagdad, Iraq (Krapsody) - How about some good ol' shoe tossing for the whole family?
Shoe tossing for me, shoe tossing for you, shoe tossing for all!
All this hype over the Olympics has me cringing like a hair metal lover at a Miley Cyrus concert. But, thankfully there are some events that can be more enjoyable because of 1) little girls lip synching krappy songs, 2) female volleyball players (and the political figureheads who slap their butts), 3) the amount of epic fail recorded for history's sake to laugh at.
And of course, 4) farting athletes. I wonder who the current contenders for best farter will be in the 2008 Olympics. Will they outdo Peter Johannson from the 1952 games? I think not.
You think that extra-inch was the result of cabbage and beans for breakfast, and did it give him an "unfair edge" in the high jump?
Thanks to AtomicWedgieTV.com
2) Memes spread because Blogger A tags Blogger B, thereby making Blogger B feel obligated to answer a series of silly questions or share annoying habits about themselves. It's like a virus, I've caught it, now I'm giving it to you. (Cough cough) I'd rather shove knitting needles in my eyes than have to feel obligated to do something for someone. I find it more fun to play Scrabble without any vowels, in fact I'd rather do that than partake in a meme tag.
3) I also like my freedom and my anonymity. Freedom for instance to post amoral content (which could be humorous) such as my idea of taking starving babies and hooking them to a disco ball, turning it into a flailing mass of meat, shards of mirror and stage lights, then call it art. What the hell, if Yale art major Aliza Shvarts can do a demented art project about her alleged abortions or a loco Costa Rican artist named Guillermo Vargas can chain an emaciated dog to a wall and they can be classified as urban legends and artistic nutters then I can do it too. Only I can do it better. I'll say it's fake but then it will all actually be considered real. Real fake. And since my internet identity is concealed I'll be totally anonymous so it wouldn't actually affect me in the least, it shouldn't affect anyone else either. It's the internets, which is largely unregulated, mostly built on hype, develop your own mental filter, pick your battles and get over it.
4) Krapsody is a steaming pile, that's how it started, that's how it will probably end (in the very, VERY distant future, perhaps an instant before the end of what we know as time, so don't get your hopes up). For those of you who don't like Krapsody, you know where the exit is. I shine a big spotlight on any krap found on the net that strikes my interest. No one said it had to be good, I never claimed it has to be and I certainly don't expect readers to think so either. If it makes you laugh, great! My job is done. If it makes me laugh, that's even better.
5) Meme tagging is used as a way for blatant shameless self-promotion amongst a circle of bloggers, which I do not entirely frown upon. I'm not opposed to whoring as whoring can be good. Unless your blog is over-run by them or the whores are SEO, internet marketing, adult, lenders, pharmaceutical spammers, vying for your attention so they can get you to look at or sell you something that is 9 times out of 10 a complete waste of time. I like to catch spammers at their own game, baiting them with useless links and the possibility of actually being able to scam me. But 99.9% of them use fake email addresses anyway!
6) Meme tagging is an excuse to not write something interesting. How many times does the meme tag get used as a way to avoid posting something of substance? Well there is certainly nothing of substance here. So if you should happen to find it, please let me know. I've tried to find it but feel I am better at golf, and I suck at golf. That's because I hate golfing. Come to think of it I also have an absolutely horrid track record for following instructions.
7) The Pain! The Pain! Meme tags are painful. They cause hemmoroids. Meme tags are entirely responsible for MASSIVE rectal damage. It's true. Because of how much time you spend sitting on your ass trying to keep up with meme taggings and then the comments. As a preventative cure I just shot an entire case of Preparation-H up my bung. I buy it in bulk just for these occasions.
8) Meme tags evoke a sense of elitism, like "we're special and you're not", even though everyone who blogs has done it before. So no one is really that special. Unless it's me. And when I say special I don't mean mentally challenged, I mean special like this.
So, since I've sorta, kinda, already done the meme by revealing eight pointless facts/habits about myself you never really cared to know about (if you were paying attention and caught it), at this point I'm going to break the rules some more. Well, not exactly break the rules. I'm going to CHANGE the rules. How's that? I just changed the rules! Rules are made to be broken... or at least bent. So get bent... RULES!
I will end this meme catastrophe simply by NOT tagging anyone!
Crimeny Jehosophat, tag EIGHT PEOPLE?! No way. That’s too many. Besides, I know I’m late to this party, hasn’t everybody already done this one? I would not inflict the pressure of a meme tag on my worst enemy. Every meme has to come to an end. Look, if you haven’t done it, go do it. Okay? No, on second thought don't.
There are strange things happening in the land of Butt in the Adventures of Butt 2000, if this funny game doesn't annoy you then the music will.
Want to kill some time at work (or wherever)?
The Games Arcade has over 300 games to entertain you when my blog articles do not, or if you are simply waiting for my next one.
Of course these are free to play (F2P) and users can save game statistics on their games pages and receive awards for playing some of them. My gift to you, courtesy of Miniclip.com, so have fun with that.